Monday, August 11, 2014

A Tail of Two Parties


Last week I knew I was in trouble when I saw the peeps looking at the above flyer. Anybuddy who remembers my post about last summer's party at the condo complex will remember that it didn’t turn out too good for The Cat. Oh, sure, I got exploited when the peeps used me to get the conversation started, but did I get any sliders or food? NO.

On Saturday, the peeps slipped out shortly after 6 pm, promising once again to come home after getting their free eats. I waited … and waited … and waited some more. Once again I was lied to and someone is going to pay the price.

Cats and kittehs of the jury: I present Exhibit A.
After taking their noisy convo upstairs into the hall, the peeps finally staggered came in at 10:17; a full hour and 17 minutes after the party was supposed to end. They broke last year’s record by a whopping 27 minutes and I’m counting. TW had a bottle of water in one hand and an adult beverage in the other. They were abbreviated and oscrified!

I spit on them and gave them the back of disrespect. I came running over. I wanted to sniff every inch of TW’s body. I smelled food but I could tell it wasn’t primo food like last year. Last year’s filling pork sliders were replaced by little “finger” sandwiches on cut up croissants that left one wanting more. I was, of course, disappointed to learn “finger” sandwiches weren’t actually made of fingers but of turkey luncheon meat. The peeps mentioned they had roast beef also but again, they failed to bring me a sample.

What was even more distressing—I mean what could be more distressing than not getting any roast of beef?—TW reeked of DOG! She admitted to petting three woofies—two little poodales—and a larger dog of unknown origin.

While TW was occupied by the dogs, Pop was entertaining the ladies. He jumped from one to the other seamlessly. Who knew he was so smooth as he worked the party. We learn something new about Pop every year. Who knew? Maybe next year he'll start a conga line.

TW personally thanked our mayor and councilwoman for giving UCFCC a $1000 grant to help defray costs for spaying/neutering the cat colonies in our town. As a result of that grant, anyone in town can TNR stray cats through UCFCC for $20 each. That’s a good thing.

I’m left to believe that the peeps just wanted to get away from me; after all the food wasn’t that good. They should have just come upstairs and ordered us up a mess of Chinese food; but, no, they stayed to make small talk with neighbors they most like won’t see until the next party. What, Woman? Over my dead and cold body will you be going to Anesthetics Committee meetings! Aesthetics? Whatever.

I dunno. How hard should I bite the peeps after this serious infraction?

Thanks to those Facebook furrends who came over to MY little pawty. BTW, somecat left the light on in Pop’s room.

The Back of Disrespect for my peeps.

34 comments:

Dash Kitten said...

Crikey! What a DRAMA CK!!

One good thing, they could say thank you for the neutering funding. That means a heap and just saying thank you encourages them to give heaps more. Well that's what I'm thinking.

Harvey Hutton

I hope you get your revenge.

Silver

Sparkle the Designer Cat said...

CK, you've got to put your paw down and tell your humans: NO galavanting!

Angel Prancer Pie said...

Wow! Your pawrents really got out of paw over the weekend, didn't they?

Seems like a little bitey or two might just be in order...
MOL!

Lone Star Cats said...

At least dey didn't enjoy any good foodz without ya.

Ann Staub said...

Well, CK I think next year you should just have a massive pawty at your crib while your peeps are gone. You gotta like totally trash your apartment and stuff. Maybe that would teach them a lesson! ;) Too bad the sandwiches weren't made of real fingers. Bummer! mol

Anonymous said...

Well CK, the funding thing is pawsome but the lack of respect for your feelings (and stomach) is unforgiveable. Size of bite required? I'd say HUGE....chomp away on a leg or a finger or any bare body part to show the humans that they should remember who's waiting at home for FOOD.

Hugs, Sammy

Tamago said...

Hahaha the "I spit on them...." line made me laugh even though it was crossed out! Sorry your peeps left you alone for so long, but at least they didn't get to enjoy real "finger" food :-)

Molly The Wally said...

We agree next year you have a pawty of your own CK. Peeps not invited of course.
Have a marvellous Monday.
Best wishes Molly

Bev Green said...

Goodness me CK well funding great..no noms appalling...not even a kitty bag..not a taste just left over sniffs..and they are dead boring..yep back of disrespect and possibly some litter tray shenanigans..just sayin...hugs and loves Fozziemum xxx

Melissa and Truffles (Mochas, Mysteries and Meows) said...

The adventures at your place are just something else, CK. You definitely need to plan ahead next year and invite your neighbor kitties over to party and completely trash the place! That'll teach 'em!!!

Brian said...

Well now, everyone knows that the only REAL pawty is the one you are at CK!

CatInTheFridge said...

The back of disrespect is SCARY. Glad I didn't get that from you, and hope I never do! Yowza - Crepes.

Mariodacat said...

Next year you need to have your own pawty and no peeps in attendance.

Jenna,Mark Drady said...

did someone say pawty?
ღ husky hugz ღ frum our pack at Love is being owned by a husky!

Sometimes, Cats Herd You said...

Now TW is threatening to go to an anesthetics committee meeting and abandon you, too? Really, that's too much.

The Furries of Whisppy said...

How about a pawty at home while TW is at the "Anesthetics (really!?) Committee Meeting"?

Marilia Bavaresco said...

♥♥♥

da tabbies o trout towne said...

CK....we... cracked... UP !!!

N we called on R friends copee & paste ta emphasize.....but ya gotta put de line threw de werds in yur minds eye...

ore better yet...knot !!!

"I spit on them and gave them the back of disrespect."

da tabbies o trout towne said...

pea ess...wear de sam hellz de CK merlot ???

Katie and Glogirly said...

Well that's pretty cool about the low cost spay/neuter thing. Kudos to the councilwoman.

But TW and Pops have some serious making up to do.
Did they at least feed you your FF before they went off partying into the wee hours?

; ) Katie

Flynn said...

That is not good that they left you longer than expected. They could at least have brought home some tasty fingers to nom. I would have come over but I have been locked up while my humans went sailing off in a big ship.

Patty Woodland said...

I'm sure it was your influence that got that grant CK

The Florida Furkids said...

Why do humans do that stuff? Sheesh......the $$$ for the spay/neuter really is pawsome!!

The Florida Furkids

Anonymous said...

OMC!! You simply MUST give each peep a taste of your smacky paws AND your bitey bites. They deserve no less for having 1) left you; 2) consorted with dogs; and 3) returned with not one single sample of each of the foodables...the very nerve!!

Alasandra, The Cats and Dogs said...

Well CK we thinks what you should do is be supper nice to the peeps when they get home, eat any foods they bring you and act like everything is OK, then at 1AM start yowling loudly, until they get up to see what the matter is. Assure them nothing is wrong and go back to sleep, then at 2 am repeat .......repeat every hour on the hour. We assure you they won't drink anymore adult beverages.

The Island Cats said...

Sheesh, CK. The least they coulda done is bring you a morsel or two from the party.

meowmeowmans said...

We're glad for that funding, but the fact that Pop and RW didn't bring you any tasty morsels is unconscionable!

Spitty-the-Kitty said...

You know, CK, I just don't get why the Humans think they can just drop everything and go out whenever the fancy strikes them without even *asking* us for purrmission. I mean, I bet you would NOT have given them so much leeway--and 1:17 LATE? Well, I'm sorry, but that is just UN-AC-CEP-TA-BLE.
But what really tips the whole thing from misdemeanor into felony territory is the failure to bring you some tastes of the food. No matter it wasn't as good as last year's--it was still SOMETHING and you should have had some.
You bite them as hard as you think necessary, my sweet darling.
In fact, if you want, I will come and help you. Maybe we can make them scream in tandem?

The Swiss Cats said...

Next time, you should trash the house with an extra big pawty to give them a lesson ! We would be happy to help you ! Purrs

Fur Everywhere said...

You gotta put your paw down and demand that if the humans are going to go out, they must bring you a suitable meal, at least.

Kjelle Bus aka Charlie Rascal said...

I have only one thing to miaow and that is = HUMANS , do we really need them ??!!
Sorry that I missed your PARTY :(
My hopeless human was working ALL weekend and when she wasn´t working she was picking Black Berries *sighs*

XOXO

Prudence said...

OMD CK! Bad enough that the peeps left you alone on a Saturday, but to not bring any noms back with them? The horror! We like that the UCFCC got that grant from the politicos though, that's good news for the kitties!

Maxwell, Faraday and Allie said...

Yeah but yanno the whole TNR grant is a very nice thing!!!

Kitties Blue said...

Sounds like the delicious food touted on the invitation was a bold-faced lie. Still, your humans could have brought you some turkey and roasted beef. And then petting three doggies...wow, total betrayal. At least this party only happens once a year. XO, Lily Olivia, Mauricio, Misty May, Giulietta, Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth and Calista Jo