Keisha in the Middle

Wait till you hear what my peeps did!

My peeps rarely eat meat. It’s a treat when we have it and it’s usually chicken cos they don’t eat red meat. TW was still feeling poorly on Thursday. Her legs felt weak and she was dizzy. She remembered her acupuncturist telling her she needed animal protein last time she was so sick. They decided to get hot sandwiches. TW ordered the dead calf and Pop ordered chicken. The fun started once the food arrived. Unfortunately, there is no video or still photos of this incident so I had to use file footage of myself on the table.

I thought the takeout place should have been marked C for Cow and C for chicken but they weren’t marked at all. TW was really looking forward to her veal since she hadn’t eaten it in decades and rightly so. She said desperate times call for desperate measures. It had been so long that she had no idea what it tasted like. (That should have been a clue, Pop.)

The Cat jumped on the table as soon as she saw the takeout. Whoa! I’m getting a treat! TW took one of the sandwiches and passed the other over The Cat to Pop. She took a small bite. She assured Pop that it was the veal.

They should have ordered meatball pizza.

Pop: Are you sure? This doesn’t look like chicken.

TW: Lemme see.

Passes sandwiches over The Cat again.

TW: Oh yeah, that was the veal.

Pop: OK

Passes sandwiches back over The Cat.

Pop (eyeing sandwich): So you’re sure cos I don’t eat that stuff.

TW: That’s why I’m tasting them. Pass it back and I’ll try it.

CK: When am I gonna get some grub.

My head is spinning. All I want is some of that meat.

Passes sandwiches over The Cat once again.

TW: I’m telling you, this is the chicken.

Passes sandwiches over The Cat one last time.

TW: I’m going to eat this sandwich before it gets cold.

Did I mention that since TW is sick, she can’t taste anything? Neither did she.

CK mooches a piece of meat from each sandwich. She loves TW’s but ignores Pop’s.

TW: She’s enjoying a new taste in her mouth. Look, she won’t eat the chicken. This veal sure is tender.

The Woman finishes her sandwich.

Pop (pushes half sandwich away): I’m full but I think I got the cow. Look at the color.

TW (leans in): Are you through with that? Let me sample that one. [chomp!] You’re right! That IS the veal! I’m sooooo sorry. The veal is usually sliced much thinner than the chicken. Oh, I guess I should have warned you everything tastes the same since I’ve been sick.

Ya think?

I’m staying on the chair where it’s safe. Those two are nutz.