Saturday, November 24, 2012

Senile Saturday—Door Wars

To me a door war is when TW locks her bedroom door and won't let me in. In fact, any closed door in the apartment is enough for me to declare war. After all, on my adoption papers, TW wrote that I could go anywhere in the apartment I wanted to.

This is the only side of the door I ever see!
This is Senile Saturday so I'll tell you the peeps lame definition of door wars. I kinda hesitate to write about this cos it could cause recriminations around here. Since my fame, several humans in our complex read my blog. Then again, when have I shied away from embarrassing the peeps?

TW always decorates the apartment door for Christmas. When they had the house, they used to light up the windows and porch. Our door is opposite the elevator so it's the first thing anyone sees when they get off the elevator. Our old neighbor in the next apartment used to put up a mangy wreath with holly berries for Christmas and leave it up until Easter. This is fact. The only way TW could shame them into taking it down was to put up an Easter decoration.

Then the new neighbors moved in. A couple of snobs from NYC. They both work in finance so you'd figure they must have a bit of money. Let's just say when it comes to decorating, all their taste is in their mouths. Last year their Halloween door consisted of a light-up pumpkin that they couldn't figure out where to plug it in so they added some fake spider webs. Half of the spider webs fell down the next day. The neighbors didn't bother to fix them so they stayed that way until Halloween.

This year, the same pumpkin when up. TW countered with a door covering with bright pumpkins on it. For some reason, the neighbors took the pumpkin down and replaced it with this:


Scary, isn't it? Tacky doesn't begin to describe it. I don't want to tell you what the peeps first impression of it was. Shock, mostly. It looks like some sort of hundred-year-old voodoo thing. Upon close inspection, they're cats but that's NOT what they remind the peeps of. They found it offensive as did this little ghetto kitteh. It stayed up as a shining beacon of, um, bad taste until November 6th when they put up their elaborate Thanksgiving display which consists of


some plastic leaves.

The peeps don't usually do a Thanksgiving door display but TW was inspired. She rushed out to the 99¢ store to try to top this amazing leaf and she found this:


I don't pretend to know what goes on in the humans' minds but I do think that dollar would've been better spent on 2 cans of Fancy Feast. This thing is tacky but it certainly blows the leaf outta the water. Na mean? Then again, think how stunning MY picture would look on the door!

34 comments:

  1. CK, we totally agree that your picture should be on that door for sure. Bet no one can do any better than that. Have a great day.

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  2. Undoubtedly your Christmas door will be way better than the neighbors'!

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  3. Yes, a full length picture of your lovely self she go on the door. You with a jack o lantern for Halloween. You with a Turkey for Thanksgiving, You with Holly and Mistletoe for the Holidays, You with the Easter Bunny for Easter and just YOU whenever there isn't a Holiday.

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  4. Closed doors are no fun anytime CK! Your posts are always fun though!

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  5. BOL Keisha you crack us up. Hope your neighbours don't read your blog. The plastic leaves are just hilarious. What in the world are they thinking of? Have a super Saturday.
    Best wishes Molly

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  6. Hope your neighbours all have better senses of humour than their... uh... taste. Yup. I agree with you, totally. When it comes to good taste, not much can beat the Fancy Feast! purrs

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  7. Ok, I've got it! We get a photo of you, TW & Pop peeking out of your apartment with the door open. You know, heads craned around the edge of the door frame. Then we blow it up really big and make a giant sticker out of it. Attach it to the door like wall paper. The tacky neighbors open up their door and .........SURPRISE! That'll get em.

    ; ) Katie & Glogirly

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  8. Mama shut me out of her bedroom ONCE! My response was to try to dig a hole to China to get under the door and back IN! She never shut me out since then! Ha ha! Purrs, Abbi

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  9. I would NOT want my picture on my door - humans might try to come over to see me! And I am selective about the company I keep.

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  10. Here's a new business opportunity for you...Door decor consultant...I think you and TW would be great at it...and BTW, I am SO glad you'renot my neighbors cause I don't want to see my tackyiness on display for all LOL!

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  11. Lol, can't wait to see what the Christmas door looks like!

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  12. Door wars are fun! We can't wait to see the Christmas one--that's going to be PAWSOME!! xx

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  13. Yeah, I think you should put your photo up on the door...would look ever so much better!

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  14. If your photograph was on the door, you would look fantsatic!

    Nubbin wiggles,
    Oskar

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  15. If your photograph was on the door, you would look fantsatic!

    Nubbin wiggles,
    Oskar

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  16. We see a new reality TV show in the making: Decor Wars!

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  17. yeah! get TW to put a photo of YOU on that door...way better! paw pats, Savvy

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  18. Really?? That leaf decoration has to be a mistake... why bother, one wonders? I love Ryker's idea!!

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  19. Who will win the War of Lame Door Decor (WoLDD)? We wait with baited breath...

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  20. Haha! We love Katie and Glogirly's idea! Those neighbors won't know what hit them!!

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  21. CK, you got mom laffing and that's no easy task right now. Fanks.

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  22. You are a riot CK,. You must have interesting neighbors too. Sounds like a fun neighborhood.

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  23. I was totally surprised by your article. Door Wars in our house (trailer) is caused when the biped locks us out of our bedroom and we sit outside yowling. I kinda like your wars tho it wouldn't work so well out here in the country. The only one to see a decoration would be the neighbors cat that lives
    on our porch.

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  24. You should kick down the door, like they do in movies!!
    Cotton

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  25. We're with you on this, CK. A photo of you, (a kitteh fur all seasons) would be purrfect on the door!

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  26. You're so right! In fact, for Christmas they should make a wreath of pictures of your face! now that would be class!

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  27. Ha ha ha ha ha! This was a Great Post, a Hall-of-Famer. My Human is the only one in the building who even makes an effort! Right now we have a lovely and tasteful little fall/berry-ish little dealio. Soon, the Christmas Wreath will appear.

    There are only six units in the building but the other 5 people are just "meh". At least your neighbors-with-the-bad-taste are in the game, MOL. Well, sort of.

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  28. You can do a really good job of "customizing" the carpets if you've got them!! That's what I do. The pile is very much more shagged!! ;)

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  29. What the cat! You be able to goings anywhere you like unless it's unsafe place. Who she thinking she is? Da disrespecfullency!

    Can PMs do sumfin for you?

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  30. *MOL*
    Me neither can wait to see what the Christmas door would look like ?!

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  31. This post is hilarious! I think you should all put up the wrong holiday door decor. For instance, when they do tacky Christmas, put up a nice Easter display.

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  32. Every time Marc and I would go shopping, Alex would look at our bags and ask did we really need that? Fancy feast would have been a much better purchase he would explain...

    Thanks for pointing out about Alex's ornament on Gracie's tree... You and Terry made me cry (in a good way) this Am...

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