Saturday, February 16, 2013

Stalking My Prey

TW is getting out of control and I don't know what to do about it. Seriously. I don't know if I didn't train her correctly or what. This biting method has been backfiring. What a conundrum. She still hasn't figured out that stalking is an art form that cannot be accomplished in a minute or two. Let me set the scenario.

Step 1. I lead TW over to the tunnel I like to play in and stick my head in one end.
Step 2. She sticks her hand in the other side and sorta wiggles it around.
Step 3. I stalk my prey. A few seconds pass and my back feet start moving causing my backside to wriggle back and forth. Sometimes TW's reflexes cause her to pull out prematurely even though she knows I'm not going to touch her hand.

Stalking my prey in the Tunnel of Pain & Suffering. Where you going, Woman! I ain't through with you!

Kittehs, if I don't run through the tunnel right away, TW gets up and walks away. Any kitteh worth his or her salt, knows that we need time to stalk. Timing is everything in catching our prey. So is patience. She doesn't seem to comprehend this simple logic. The Woman has little patience, especially when The Cat is involved. I have to wait till my prey is hypnotized by my stunningness before I pounce. I say it's only a minute or two. TW claims she waits for 4 or 5 minutes before she bails. She really needs to get her internal clock batteries recharged.

The Woman always has lame excuses why she bails like "I don't have all day like you do" (as if! This cat is very busy!) or "I have chores to do" or "I thought you fell asleep." Then there's my favorite "If only you knew how much my knees hurt." Huh? How about MY feelings and how you just hurt them? I want to play and she disses me using THAT sorry excuse? It's not like I keep her on her knees for hours.

Don't even suggest that I bite her cos if I do, then she won't play with me for months! OK, maybe it's just a few day or a few hours but that's years in a cat's life.

She does the same thing with the smousey laser. If I don't jump the first time she moves it, she turns it off and walks away. Her excuse for this poor sportsmanship is something about batteries. I'm guessing she's running low on batteries cos she sure doesn't expend much energy playing with this cat.

19 comments:

The Cat From Hell said...

Hmmm, me has a brother for that!
Kisses
Nellie

Patty Woodland said...

It's a tough life with humans but so worth it! Just keep your patience

Prancer Pie said...

So, your basically tellin us that TW has "premature evacuation" of the tunnel? This is terrible. She should see a vet for this. HaHaMeow!

Pee Ess - please excuse our Mommy's sick sense of humor.

Sparkle the Designer Cat said...

Oh, I have a solution for this! A couple, actually.

Katie and Glogirly said...

Humans have the attention span of a gnat.
; ) Katie

Molly The Wally said...

Ha ha Katies' comment. So true. Have a super Sunday.
Best wishes Molly

Katie Isabella said...

boy, that sounds just like MY momma! Same deal, CK!!!

Brian said...

Well that just doesn't seem right, you can't be rushed on these things!!!

Sometimes, Cats Herd You said...

Our peeps do the same thing, sometimes. They don't understand the contemplative nature of cats.

Anonymous said...

Poor misunderstood Kitty! Why don't you do like our cats do...pounce on her head when she's fast asleep. Works like a charm! Happy Weekend!

The Island Cats said...

OMC! We're laffin' and laffin' at Prancer Pie's comment!

Maybe TW needs to go back to "How to Play with a Cat" school.

Clooney said...

Oh CK, you are such a cute character!

Katnip Lounge said...

CK, how about a string onna stick> TW can stand up and dangle it at the end of the tube. We find the string take less time to beguile than almost anything else.

CATachresis said...

OMC!! CK, are you sure we don't have the same human?? I have the zact same problem! There has to be something we can do?? ;)

Katz Tales said...

Guido moved in with us when Au became too old to play with Target. Maybe it's time for a furry companion?

meowmeowmans said...

OMC. Humans have SUCH short attention spans!

Texas, a Cat in New York said...

Humans have NO patience AT ALL and they complain, they complain, they complain...
Purrs

Spitty-the-Kitty said...

DARLING! I could not agree more! Your Human and My Human went to the same school of lousy kitty playing. Sheesh!

Hey--far from a day of no posting (sorry we was a bit late--the Human had the nerve to go OUT), this is a day of posting about YOU!!!!! You absolutely MUST come and see! I'm glad your tunnel is right there all ready for transport!

Anonymous said...

Cat time and human time are very different.