Wednesday Word—Asthma

That’s a pretty scary Wednesday Word. I’ve been having a terrible time with my asthma these past 2 weeks. After an extremely bad night on Monday, the peeps whisked me off to the evil v-e-t on Tuesday. I was betrayed by Pop.

I regret to say, I’m usually kinda a pushover to get into the PTU. I’ve only fought them on one occasion. This year, Pop picked me up, carried me to the living room and introduced me to the open PTU. I climbed right in. All hell broke loose once the door was locked. I clawed the bars. I banged up against the sides of the box. I sang the song of my people—loudly and proudly. I was like a caged animal. Wait—I WAS a caged animal!

I continued singing in the elevator. An idea popped into TW’s empty head. They keep captured feral cats quiet and calm by placing a blanket or towel over the PTU. She went upstairs to get one. She is a shrewd one, that TW. There wasn’t a peep out of me during the approximately 20 minute ride to Secaucus. Normally, I’d sing the entire way.

What sane cat would enter this place of no return?

I got checked in and immediately brought into the torture chamber where the peeps were told I’d be seeing a different doctor. Bring her on! I’m ready for Round 1. Gong!

Un-oh, the technician has the long orange gloves on. No fair! Penalty—15 yards for unnecessary roughness! They tried to weigh me in the PTU but it didn’t work so Pop picked me up and put me on the scale. 10.5 lbs. She said she was concerned that I’d lost almost a pound. Say what? The invoice from last year said I weighed 9.10 lbs but since the invoice from THIS year says 11.4 lbs, I think I can see what the problem is. Hope you understand that better than I do.

Look at how scared that stunning cat looks. Hiss!

Ears checked out fine. Teeth? She said they looked great. I said it’s from biting the humans. Their tough skin gives my teeth a workout. TW axed that they give me the rabies vaccine in the tail and she said it hurt more there.  TW grinned and clapped her hands. Bwahaha, she said. I hissed and hissed some more.

Of course, TW forgot to bring my business cards so after a long conversation about Grumpy Cat and the Keyboard Cat—am I chopped liver, Woman—we finally left the torture chamber. Then we had to sit in the waiting room forever for a taxi. TW went crazy over all the pansy lovable cats waiting for their forever homes. The black one rubbed all over her hand as she scritched him.

Ack! Here comes a woofie. It was a black Pomeranian. His human worked for a rescue group with Angel Wings in the title. They go all over the country rescuing animals in bad, abusive situations. He didn’t have any business cards either. What is it with these humans? I thought they loved to hand out cards.

"Get me out of here! I belong out there. Son of a b----!”—Siouxsie Sioux
Click here if the video doesn’t play.

On the ride home, I was so scared, sore and tired, I couldn’t even sing the song of my people. The hack was a bruv and he and Pop talked sports most of the way home.

Check out the pearly whites!

I met one of my adoring public once we got back into our gated community. She oohed and aahed and said I was even more stunning in the fur than in pictures. There you have it! MORE STUNNING LIVE THAN IN PHOTOS!

I couldn’t wait to eat once I got released from the PTU. I gobbled up my FF tuna and axed for more. I got more but little did I know that TW dosed me!! Yes, she did! She placed some Prednisone into my food and I ate it. She’s gonna be sorry she ever did.

to be continued...