Monday, February 6, 2017

Job Opening at Stunning Keisha

Job Opening at Stunning Keisha

Hola! Last week I hinted about firing my proofreader. When I started blogging, I used to try to surprise Pop with my posts. He'd read them after they published like the rest of you. For the past year or two, I put him to work proofing cos TW was letting a few typos slip by. I'm a perfectionist. I can't have typos.

I've become convinced, however, that he thinks he only has to proof the secret messages you see when you hover over the images. He beams with the pride of a job well done when he tells us of a typo. The rest of the piece always looks fine to him—with a few minor corrections.

TW stays awake until the wee hours midnight so she can make sure the post goes up as scheduled. Being as she's senile, she sometimes forgets to schedule them. She reads each one after it's published. Lately she's been finding a bunch of typos and errata. Every other Caturday, she forgets to link to Athena's art blog hop which is something a proofreader/copyeditor should be looking for.

Job Opening at Stunning Keisha
I've hung the sign on the door.
On Wednesday, she found this "National PatTheft Awareness." I freaked out and ordered her to fix it. She hates to make fixes on the ipawd cos so much can go wrong but she corrected it to read "National Pet Theft Awareness." Sometimes we're glad that most of our views happen later in the day.

Friday, I discovered she forgot to link to the blogs from the cats who chose the photos—again. Gasp! I wasn't happy. In fact I was irate and inconsolable.  Did I mention I'm a perfectionist. She told me she couldn't fix it until the morning. Unacceptable! This isn't the first time she forgot the links or that our proofer hasn't caught it although he did catch a typo in one of the image alt tags.

Pop's excuse is how tired he is when he gets home from work. That's no excuse since there's typos on my weekend posts too. And I don't wanna hear about his "chronic dry eyes" either. TW shares the blame since she doesn't finish typing my posts until after Pop is in bed. I say less excuses and more proofing!

Don't get me started on all the typos TW makes when I comment and post to Twitter or Facebook! This brilliant cat is made to look like a careless simpleton.

My sleek black fur has all gone gray from worry about what the next mistake is going to be and if it will be an embarrassing one. Just type what I say Woman! If I say black fur, you type black fur! Sorry you had to hear that. You'd think TW would know that typing isn't her only job. She needs to provide links, images and everything else that goes into a blog. What's a cat to do when her staff is so incontinent?

23 comments:

Summer at sparklecat.com said...

Maybe you can run an ad? There are a LOT of editors and proofreaders out of work... if you've read any news websites lately, you might have noticed.

Angel, Kirby and Max said...

We had better start looking for one, too. Our Dad proofs our blog, too!

Momma Kat and Her Bear Cat said...

Ooooh! Ooooh! ME!!
[Don't fall for it CK! She's just as hopeless!!]
I haven't had a typo since ... since ... I can't even remember!
[Yesterday.]
I'm fastidious and a perfectionist too!
[And yet she routinely insults my friends my mixing up genders ... she told Binky she was a "handsome boy." ON MORE THAN ONE POST! And after reading the about page TEN times.]
Err ... alt tags?
[{sigh} Told you.]

Spitty-the-Kitty said...

Well, my Human is a freaking *ENGLISH TEACHER* so what's her excuse? It's a good thing my blog is more like Instagram: a picture and maybe two or four sentences. She is a terrible blogger and an even worser visitor. She tries to get the blog right (though she often finds mistakes after it's been published for some hours) but I don't even have enough toesicles to count the mistakes in comments (when I can even get her to make them, that is). She tries to use that whole work thing too, but I'm not having any of that. C'mon! It's not like I'm asking her to edit War and Peace. Phfft. Also, we don't even know *how* to do that cool floaty text.

Melissa, Mudpie and Angel Truffles (Mochas, Mysteries and Meows) said...

Can't help you here. I can't complain about how Mommy runs our blog, but I think she's getting incontinent too. Last week alone she tried washing her hands with the sponge instead of a bar of soap, added cold water to a tea kettle she had just boiled, and ran the coffee pot through an entire cycle with only water (no coffee grounds). --Mudpie

Tamago said...

Humans are so impurrfect unlike kitties. I can't blame your peeps too much 'cause I myself do typo a lot! I hope you find a good staff :-)

Colehaus Cats said...

Pesters You need pesters proclaiming your job opening posted far and wide. Pestering your neighborhood. Pestering FB and Twitter. Of course, your photo will be on every one of those pesters. Oh, wait! Did we say pesters? POSTERS! We meant POSTERS!

Guess our Mom can look elsewhere...

Cat Lady Alley said...

Typos happen to the best of us. I think you should give 'em another chance. Maybe if you gave them a raise they'd be more on top of it?

Kitties Blue said...

C.K., we feel your pain, except our mom is the fanatic. We could care less. She proofreads each post about a dozen times, and still a typo might slip through. She did just the opposite of TW and have our dad proof all her posts before they were published. But like TW and your dad, our dad is usually sleeping by the time Mom finishes our posts, so any typos or bloopers remain until he reads the post the next day. Then Mom immediately fixes them. With what we see on some blogs, we think TW does a darn good job. We say, if you don't write well, don't write or at least take a course in writing! Duh! We think you should hold on to TW...you could end up with much, much worse. XOCK, Lily Olivia, Mauricio, Misty May, Giulietta, Angel Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth, Calista Jo and Cooper Murphy p.s. Did you notice that we got on a bit of a rant. We cannot tolerate typo and grammatical error ridden posts when we are reading!

The Swiss Cats said...

We feel your pain, CK, it's so hard to find good staff ! Purrs

Brian said...

It's okay CK, really! Typos are just the techy way of getting even with the peeps.

The Florida Furkids said...

MOL we're laffin at the last sentence!!! "What's a cat to do when her staff is so incontinent?"

Thanks for the chuckle!!!

The Florida Furkids

da tabbies o trout towne said...

ck...judgin frum feed bak we haz ree ceeved over de yeerz, we due knot think trout towne iz de blog that shuld bee givin ya add vize bout.....fotoz ~~~

{ bet cha thinked we waz gonna say spellin huh !!

☺☺☺♥♥♥

The Indulged Furries said...

My typist proofreads multiple times but mistakes often slip through until she reads the live post, then has to go edit it. We don't have a lot of readers and figure our visitors will forgiver her a little oops now and again. I'm sure your readers know that TW is doing her best and her shortcomings are not a reflection on you.

Anonymous said...

Oh CK. We too have dat purroblem from time to time. Da worst is when mommy actually misspells one of our names. Are you kitten? It's our names? Surely she knows how to spell 'em?. We didn't ask fur incessant somethin' different, not like everypawdy else spellings?. We feel ya' girl. Big hugs

Luv ya'

Dezi and Raena

The Island Cats said...

Good help is so hard to find, CK. Even our typist, the mom, is seriously lacking when it comes to proofreading and getting it right. We give up.

Lone Star Cats said...

I dunno CK, but if my staff wuz da incontinent, I might invest in a raincoat.

Spitty-the-Kitty said...

One thing I forgot to say yesterday: At least *YOUR* Human helps you blog and visit. And really, that's the essence of the whole thing: R-e-l-i-a-b-i-l-i-t-y. My Human clearly does not understand that.

pilch92 15andmeowing said...

Phoebe's Grammie always lets me know when I have a typo. Maybe she would proofread for you too.

Ms. Phoebe said...

I was thinking the same thing as you don't want to end up in the tub having to be bathed like humans. I'd also avoid sitting on TW's lap or any seat she has sat on. My angel great great grandma used to wear these disposable underwears for humans that seemed to help a lot- they were a lot more competent than her bladder. MOL! *shakes with laughter*
-Kaspars

Jean Neilson said...

Dad always tells mom when he thinks something is wrong with the post so mom goes in and fixes it before I see the mess she's made.

Shoko

Katie Isabella said...

I feel your pain! MY typist was extra horrible. TERRIBLY horrible at typos and etc. because she couldn't see worth a dang and didn't know it. Once she has glasses..why it's just plain amazing! She make 75% fewer typos which means a LOT less considering how bad she was! She embarrassed me many many times and now she partially embarrasses me. I too loved that last sentence in your blog!

Janet Keefe said...

LOL. Your staff needs to have OCD. People with OCD proofread numerous times. Ridiculous amounts of times! It is no wonder they have no life outside of their blogs. Maybe your peeps have actual lives?
-The crew at Wag 'n Woof Pets