Monday, December 5, 2016

Lost in the Supermarket #senile

Lost in the Supermarket #senile
Where the Hell-o Kitty are the peeps and my dinner?

This post is for the humans out there. I don't suppose many of the kitties will understand except the part where my dinner was late. Think of your biggest nightmare in the supermarket and I'm gonna one-up you.

Pop always spends time before the Saturday shopping trip loading digital coupons onto his card. The first thing that went wrong is they forgot to bring the list. Have you ever heard two little old people argue in the supermarket? Those people were my peeps, I'm embarrassed to say. Then came the checkout debacle.

Remember the little old couple on line in front of you; the ones who look completely helpless? You say to yourself "why can't these old bats shop during the week instead of on the weekend when working people shop?" Yeah, Pop used to always say that when he was younger. I guess he never thought that would be him although Pop IS working during the week. The weekend is the only time he has to shop.

Lost in the Supermarket #senile
Do any of you guys know where the peeps are?

Pop: I can't find my ShopRite card. *takes cards out of his wallet*

TW: Is it in your bag or pocket? Let me look. *makes a grab for Pop's wallet*

Pop: *dumping bag contents onto counter* It's not here. *finally hands TW the wallet*

TW: *looks through mess of a wallet* It's not here. I'll bet it's on your dresser.

Pop: I never put it there. *goes through jacket and pants pockets*

TW: Maybe they'll let us use our phone number. We have a lot of digital coupons that we need to redeem.

Lost in the Supermarket #senile

Pop: *starts giving the cashier our home number* Blah blah blah 1251.

TW: Say what? That's not our phone number. Where did you get that number from?

Pop: *looks surprised* Oh. That was my phone number a hunnert years ago. *starts to give number again and again gets it wrong*

TW: *recites number with Pop interrupting her with another wrong number*

After five tries and much confusion, the cashier says the number isn't in the system.

TW: Maybe you registered with your work number?

Pop: No. I wouldn't do that.

Time is ticking by. People are starting to move to other lines. TW is furious. Finally, Pop, in a fit of genius, holds up his i-bone with the digital card. I got it! *Cashier scans it.*

All is going well until one of the items they bought does not scan. It's not in the system. The cashier sends the bagger to check. Time is slowly ticking by.

Annoyed guy behind them in line: Maybe it's free.

TW: We don't want it if it isn't free.

Lost in the Supermarket #senile

They left it and finally paid for the rest of the order. I don't think they can ever go back to that cashier.

It took about a week for the peeps to check out. I'll bet your human would have loved to be on their line, wouldn't they? Do your humans have any funny stories from old bags ahead of them in the supermarket?

Lost in the Supermarket #senile
It's about time you're home!

Oh, when Pop got home, he remembered he'd taken the card out of his wallet when he needed his credit card to buy something online during the week. He threw it on the desk cos he thought it was an old card from another store. Good thing the peeps never throw anything away.


brokenteepee said...

I think they need to take you to the store to keep them in line CK

Lone Star Cats said...

MOL - the funniest story my momma has wuz about a drunk woman who didn't have her wallet. Den dere wuz da guy who demanded multiple jars of gefilte fish for free (da store had a thing where if it rang up wrong, you got it for free - so he'd gone back and loaded his cart with jars to try to get them all for free) - what anyone would do wif dat much gefilte fish my momma had NO idea.

Summer at said...

Wow, that was a process! Why can't humans go out and kill dinner* instead of going to the grocery store? That would make things so much easier.

*For the record, my human says I'd starve to death if I had to do that because I can't even catch a mouse by myself. She has to help.

The Daily Pip said...

Hysterical! Thanks for the Monday morning giggles - I needed them.

Mickey's Musings said...

Gee, kinds makes you glad to be a cat,except for the waiting for your food part ;)
Purrs Georgia,Julie and JJ

Thank you for your kind thoughts for Treasure.
We miss him.

Tamago said...

Hahaha, that was a funny story :-)

Layla Morgan Wilde ( Cat Wisdom 101) said...

This is way too familiar :-) Does anyone still write checks at the check out? That would take forever.

Momma Kat and Her Bear Cat said...

CK, you ***ALMOST*** starved! I see some bones jutting out there. These humans ... without us, they are just useless. Hmmm. Mine is useless even WITH me. At least she gives me a good laugh when she tries the light switch on the refrigerator (hint ... there is NO light switch on the refrigerator) ... or when she walks into the wall that hasn't moved in the 10 years we've lived here. But at least that nonsense doesn't make my dinner late. And they wonder why you bite? *** YOU'RE STARVING!!! ***

The Menagerie Mom said...

Whew, I'm glad they finally made it home so that you didn't wither away, CK. That was a close one. Though, I'm not really one to talk. This here human insists on using the self checkout at the grocery store, yet I always manage to get just about every error code in the book so that the self checkout attendant has to come over and fix it every half a second. They probably want to run screaming when I show up.

Cats Herd You said...

MOL! The head peep says she is pretty sure TW and Pop were in front of her when she ran into the store to buy milk yesterday.

Brian said...

Oh dear! My Dad was in line so long one time the milk he had expired and the ice cream melted!

Memories of Eric and Flynn said...

Bwahaha! They must have been the most popular people in the store...not! Thanks for making us smile. We needed it.

da tabbies o trout towne said...

CK...can we see 1251 in de foto frenzy thiz week !! ☺☺☺☺☺ tell pops N TW thanx for de ville kneadz sum funnee rite now....we N joyed thiz; we think ewe shuld post this each yeer like R bass turd turkee re post !! ♥♥♥

Melissa, Mudpie and Angel Truffles (Mochas, Mysteries and Meows) said...

There's never a dull moment with your peeps, is there?

Anonymous said...

MOL Oh CK we've got a bazillion of these stories, but they['re all 'bout mommy. She's da old geezer in da line. MOL Big hugs to ya'll. And even tho' we know you be one of our more feral furiends, we still included you in our gift on our Blest Sunday posty. We know dat Christmas time makes even da mostest feral of kitties calm fur a moment. :)

Luv ya'

Dezi and Raena

Noodle Cat said...

I love the story, I just hate shopping...

Noodle and crew

Jans Funny Farm said...

This story is hilarious. Unless you're the one stuck behind them with an overwhelming urge to pee - like NOW! Or your ride to the store is ready to leave and you can't check out. Oh, heck, it's hilarious anyway! Jan has never done that but she has definitely done her own strange things in a checkout line. :)

The Indulged Furries said...

Those loyalty cards can be a pain in the "you know what". I may have been behind your peeps' cousin a couple weeks ago. I swear the woman had never been through a grocery line before and acted like this was all a completely new experience. I had to practice my deep breathing and tell myself maybe she had dementia or something. Oh well, I'm glad your peeps made it hoe with all but one item.

Shoko Neilson said...

MOL...TW and pop sound almost as bad as mom and dad who celebrated their 45th anniversary yesterday. I've heard mom tell dad on his way to the store, "If they want more than you have....don't pay them anything." I'm sure dad would get far trying to run out of the store with Glad garbage bags. MOL


The Island Cats said...

Seriously, the mom would have been so annoyed if she was in line behind TW and Pop. The mom has zero patience when grocery shopping.

pilch92 said...

That is funny but, I wouldn't have wanted to be in that line.

Spitty-the-Kitty said...

Ha ha ha ha ha! This sounds *just* like a million things the Stoopy Human does all the damn time. She's a disgrace to old peeps everywhere. She's gonna be 67 in a couple of weeks. Jeez. Unbelievable!

CK, I would like it soooo much if you would call *me* "Little Spitty" once in a while XOXOXO

Anonymous said...

OK - I know you probably won't like hearing this CK but Mom and I giggled all the way through this story. Why? Mostly because this could have been her and Dad but now that she forbids Dad to go to the grocery (or most other places!) with her, it doesn't happen with such frequency. I hope they didn't forget CAT FOOD in their confusion!

Love, Angel Sammy

Laila and Angel Minchie said...

Very funny story! Our mom says she always picks the wrong line to be in.

Dragonheart, Merlin, Devi, and Chloe said...

Oh my! What an adventure your humans had in the supermarket! Our mom and dad would not have been happy to be in that line!

Three Chatty Cats said...

Oh, I hate when that happens - leaving something at home that I needed on my shopping trip! Poor CK, staring at home. Glad you didn't have to go out looking for them.

Athena Cat Goddess Wise Kitty said...

Luckily my mum does most of the shopping online these days.

Purrs xx
Athena said...

I don't know how you put up with those humans!? Can you trade them in for a newer model?

Unknown said...

CK never ever allow them to shop together again, at least not without you. Mom would have had to go to another line OR been mumbling HBO words under her breath! MOL