Fraser Fir
Showing posts with label Fraser Fir. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fraser Fir. Show all posts
Hola kitties! Tomorrow is the Winter Solstice and next Wednesday is the big day! Are you expecting anything fun under your Christmas tree? My Jewish furrends get to open their first Chanukah gift on Sunday. I didn't ax for anything this year cos I know we have a big assessment on the condo coming due soon but I know the peeps will treat me well. Are you ready to meet Santa's posse?
Hola kitties! "member I told you the peeps were sick and Fraser wouldn't be here this year? Well, something happened and he's here! Anyway, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas 'round here.
Yesterday the peeps bid farewell to Fraser. It didn't come without some funny moments for The Cat to blog about as you can imagine. Their dressing and undressing of Fraser is something that should be live-streamed as I can't remember all the funny and embarrassing details. Also, anytime the peeps are the ones being embarrassed, there isn't any proof of the photographic kind.
I guess it's back to the old grindstone for Pop after spending the last 10 or so days with me and making sure my litter box got cleaned before 3 pm. *glares at TW* Here's today's news headlines from the condo. Warning: not all involved The Cat.
It's true! I saw the fat man in the red suit shortly after my DJ shift ended last night. He looks older than the peeps and well worn. I asked him to take a selfie with me and he obliged after I plied him with the peeps' holiday cookies and some eggnog. I had some jello shots left over from #CatmasEve but he didn't want those. Something about working. I hope Kitties Blue will let me join the Sunday Selfies blog hop a day late. Oh yeah, MERRY CHRISTMAS everybuddy!
So there I was, sleeping on the chair where I have the Easy Like Sundays with Pop. There was a commotion which caused me to awake from my slumber. Where was Fraser and why was Pop holding a huge "body bag." Oh no! Did he jump or was he pushed?
Caturday TW and Pop set out with Uncle Vince to pick up either Fraser or Dougie from Home Depot, where I presume they worked part time. He would be invited to stay over the holidays. The moment they saw Fraser, it was love at first sight although Dougie preened shamelessly and almost had TW smitten. Fraser was about seven feet tall; he was full; and, boy, was he ever green! He was so fresh, he had new growths spurting out. They picked him right away. You see, last year's guest tree named Balsam got some moldy sickness before Christmas and they had to put him to sleep December 26th.
What a week! TW was busy and I still have a turkey hangover. Can you believe she was designing NEXT year’s Christmas cards? As if she’ll remember she did it. I started getting ecards but haven’t sent mine cos they’re the same as my snail mail cards and I want to get those out first. Maybe I’ll just design new ones for email.
Friday night I had uncontrollable zoomies. I ran through the house so many times at such a high speed that I was left panting. Then I had a 3 a.m. hockey game with all three of my rattle balls that lasted about 30 minutes. Of course, I won.
Nothing though prepared me for what happened Sunday. The peeps got up before breakfast and left me all alone. At least they fed me Weruva before they left so my belly was full. It was after 2:30 when I heard TW’s key in the lock. I rushed to greet her at the door and THIS is the sight that greeted me.
Shhhhh! I'm going to be very quiet about the post since I don't want to get the peeps in trouble. OK, I would, but if their butts were hauled off to jail, I'd have to go back to the shelter jail myself and that wouldn't be pretty. I've become quite used to the good life.
I told you about our new pet tree, Fraser, already. Well, his ass must've gotten tired of drinking water and he must've said something to wear out his welcome. Friday night, tons of boxes came out of the closets and Saturday morning, they began undressing Fraser. I ran around in a panic, jumping from one box to the next, not knowing what was happening. Then Uncle Vince and Aunt Marta came back. I don't know what evil happened next but when I came back into the living room, they were stuffing Fraser into a big 9-foot BODY BAG! Gasp!
Fraser! Old buddy! What have they done to you! Gasp again! There were tree needles everywhere. He must have put up quite a fight; but seeing as it was four against one, he didn't have a chance.
The humans were laughing and having a good old time while they dragged the lifeless body out into the hall. They started to clean up the evidence. There were needles and water everywhere. TW kept nervously axing if they should leave the body out in the hall for so long. What if someone sees it and reports them? Then they told me I should be happy because my cat tree was back in the spot of honor by the window.
Happy? I'd just witnessed—OK, not witnessed since my back was turned—; heard—OK, that's a bad word too since Fraser didn't scream or anything—I just knew something bad had happened to Fraser. He was out in the hall in a body bag and my cat tree was back where I wanted it. Hmmm, OK I was happy.
Once the evidence inside the apartment was gone, the humans went out to dispose of the body. They must've dumped him some place far away because they didn't return for five hours or more. My tummy was on E (empty) but I wasn't going to ax questions. The less I knew, the better. I could smell alcohol on TW's breath and they kept talking about food and some rug. I guess they went to celebrate the demise of Fraser. I was on pins and needles—pardon the pun—since TW got home about 20 minutes before I had to dj for @Spookyshorty's Spookypawty.
These events have me axing myself some serious questions: if'n they "offed" Fraser for not drinking the dreaded H2O, was I far behind? Peeps haven't seen my drink since August. After I needed fluids back in September, they even bought me some cheap, loud fountain but I refuse to use it because they didn't get it at NipandBones.com. They should know not to get me anything unless Baby Patches has tested it first.
So, I ax my furrends, do you think there's a little kitty body bag in my future too? Right now, I'm just keeping my mouth shut about certain things. Fraser, who? Remember, you didn't hear this from me.
 |
| Whoa! Fraser? You in here? |
Fraser! Old buddy! What have they done to you! Gasp again! There were tree needles everywhere. He must have put up quite a fight; but seeing as it was four against one, he didn't have a chance.
The humans were laughing and having a good old time while they dragged the lifeless body out into the hall. They started to clean up the evidence. There were needles and water everywhere. TW kept nervously axing if they should leave the body out in the hall for so long. What if someone sees it and reports them? Then they told me I should be happy because my cat tree was back in the spot of honor by the window.
 |
| My cat tree is back where it belongs |
Once the evidence inside the apartment was gone, the humans went out to dispose of the body. They must've dumped him some place far away because they didn't return for five hours or more. My tummy was on E (empty) but I wasn't going to ax questions. The less I knew, the better. I could smell alcohol on TW's breath and they kept talking about food and some rug. I guess they went to celebrate the demise of Fraser. I was on pins and needles—pardon the pun—since TW got home about 20 minutes before I had to dj for @Spookyshorty's Spookypawty.
These events have me axing myself some serious questions: if'n they "offed" Fraser for not drinking the dreaded H2O, was I far behind? Peeps haven't seen my drink since August. After I needed fluids back in September, they even bought me some cheap, loud fountain but I refuse to use it because they didn't get it at NipandBones.com. They should know not to get me anything unless Baby Patches has tested it first.
So, I ax my furrends, do you think there's a little kitty body bag in my future too? Right now, I'm just keeping my mouth shut about certain things. Fraser, who? Remember, you didn't hear this from me.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
